Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Here It Is A Year Later....

Last year at this time was my last post. After finishing up the medications last time I decided to take a break from everything. I was feeling great. No symptoms, working hard, and totally ignoring the fact that I have Lyme disease. I did not get the test to check if there was active lyme in my system. At that time we were trying to get our lives back together with working and trying to put away some money that we spent for our treatment actually saving for the treatment again and again. That is a hard thing to do in this economy especially when your so sick you can not work and your saving go quickly. So I ignored everything. Symptoms started to come back in August. First it was horrible air hunger. Then it was constant neck and shoulder pain. Come to think of it, I had those neck and shoulder pains 3 times in the past year. So bad at times I called my regular Dr and told him of the pain, went in and had xrays done on my neck and upper back, he did blood work etc... and followed up with me. He prescribed anti-inflammatory and pain meds. Eventually the pain would go away only to come back a month or two later. I didn't think it was related to the lyme back then. But now when the severe air hunger started I still had some medicines left over that were still good and decided to do a treatment that the lyme dr gave me before.  I took 3 weeks of them. They seemed to do little if nothing and the pains got really worse after I took myself off. So we both have an appointment on Dec. 3. I am worried about paying for the tests that we both need and the visit to the Lyme Dr. It has to be done regardless but we are stretched to the limits here. There never is extra money for anything let alone trying to get ourselves back into a healthy state again. I know HUH? honestly I tell myself to call 1-800- WAAH :)

Let me go over these symptoms that flared up again. Air hunger, neck and shoulder pain, stabbing pains anywhere in the body at anytime, memory issues, spelling issues, nausea, pain in my lower back, hips, thighs, knees, elbows, arms, hands. Tendinitis, Dizziness out of nowhere along with pressure in my head, I would think I was going to pass out. I also had the feeling over the summer that I couldn't drive safely. Hard to explain but almost felt like that section of the brain wasn't working and I was afraid I would get into an accident. Sounds funny doesn't it, "missing brain sections". Honestly it really felt void somewhere in there.
Now when I work hard in my greenhouse making my dishgarden orders I am racked with pain, severe pain like I was hit by a truck. This is so hard to deal with at times especially when you look alright from the outside.

I don't know what the future will bring. I only know that it will be filled up with new treatments until we are symptom free and take a blood test to see where we are at.
I have to admit I know people with lyme who are much worse off than myself or my husband is. Symptoms they will never get rid of and literally are scared they won't make it much longer. Some are strong regardless of what they go through, others are just bedridden, waiting, for something to happen to get better or to just wish it would end.

Lyme is so serious it boggles my mind how trivial most Dr's and people think it is. "Oh you have lymes?" Yeah my dog has that too!" Thats what I hear all the time. Until they experience it for themselves they will never know the damage it can cause, sadly even death. It is still sad that chronic lyme "does not" exist in most Dr's eyes (world). WE ARE PROOF. STOP THE MADDNESS, STOP THE LIES, STOP THE POLITICAL FIGHTS. Those of you who deny it? Well, it saddens me to wish upon you what people who fight this nasty disease feel everyday and then to be told your crazy and it is not lyme. Walk in these shoes for one year then come back and tell us its not real. Tell me those tiny spirochetes are not real swimming in our bodies and delivering us into hell!!!!! We live in the hell, there is plenty of proof, it does do damage beyond repair and it does kill.

For the people who read this and think they may have it, NEVER GIVE UP, NEVER TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER FROM YOUR DR. YOU MUST FIND A LYME LITERATE DR TO TREAT YOU OR AT LEAST A DR WHO BELIEVES ITS REAL, WANTS TO KNOW MORE AND TREAT YOU WITH THE HELP OF A LYME LITERATE DR. FIGHT THE FIGHT IF NOT FOR YOURSELF THAN FOR YOUR CHILDRENS AND FAMILIES SAKE! THIS IS NOT A FICTIONAL THING.